Thalidomide

Jeff’s Autistic Theory of Neurodiversity

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First, all creatures, or most creatures would qualify as “Autistic,” in this theory, it begins with an assumption that all creatures’ neurology is diverse, every which way, within and without orders, families, genus or species, and that most are specific and quirky, and that “Autism,” is not a type, due to it’s diversity, rather, that “Autism,” is the diversity, from which has spring a new type, making humans different from the rest of the creatures fairly recently in geological terms, and the new type is the Allistic Human, with its rather specific typing and neurology.

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I’m afraid I do not know enough about other sorts of neurotype, ADHD, etc., to be clear, but they are likely also a part of the Primal Diversity, TM, and not the new thing, because of the nature of the actual new thing which would restrict the diversity generally.

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This framing is a reversal of the existing, perhaps tacit framing, the Neurotypical framing of the situation in which they are the original sort of human and the rest of the neurotypes are spinning off from them, this is clearly not their trend, to create diversity, but to restrict it, so the idea that Autists, etc., are something new is sort of impossible, we see a history of humanity fighting and burying the new and strange, not creatively throwing up options – that’s actual nature that does that, evolution that does that – and it did already, the world didn’t begin recently.

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The new development, Allism, is an aggressive, dangerous, self-selecting genetic thing, dare I say, a fatal mutation that has destroyed the environment upon which it depended in no more than a few hundred thousand years, maybe in only a few tens of thousands of years, maybe even in only a single ten of thousands of years.

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The evidences we see for humankind’s specific footprint upon the world are very recent and everyone always talks about ‘civilization,’ as something new – except NT civilization still thinks it’s the original form, somehow.

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It must be built in, part of the type, and difficult not to think it for them.

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This is a thing that I will predict, that if it ever occurs to them to search for Allistic genes, or to notice the ones they’ve already found, they will find them appearing at these scales of time, perhaps where the fossil record records changes, beginning maybe when fire was harnessed, and then at three hundred thousand years ago and/or at thirty thousand years ago (these numbers from Wrangham, The Goodness Paradox).

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Maybe even less, I’m open. The evidences of wars would seem like a pointer.

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That’s about it.

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This much seems self-evident, by their own myths, history and pre-history:

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It is the human warrior neurotype, Allism is, and as such, much of their “human science,” is skewed towards aggression and “control,” of something, perhaps also the  most natural sort of thought for the type, and they want to say that they are the original sort of human being, but the rapidity of the destruction suggests otherwise, does this madness look like it could have lasted three million years to you? This attitude? I think we all know, it’s come to its conclusion far sooner than that as warriors’ plans always do.

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This was the first bit of restructuring this idea brought me, it explains the existence of these several neurotypes in a way that fits our evolution in terms of what we do know of history and pre-history, because the world a million years ago wasn’t constant war and environmental destruction and it is now, so the new thing is the active thing, the working, fighting, busy thing, and the Allistics, the regular people of the world absolutely define themselves in exactly this way. In fact, the rest of us are a problem for them because we do not log or mine or war hard enough, or to put it in current terms I do not love: they cannot make any money off of us.

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The next bit the restructuring changed was the “sociopath CEO,” idea, it makes more sense the other way about from here:

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So we are the primordial soup and Allists are the new fatal mutation that may finish our species along with most of the rest of them – and the worst kind of people, the most dangerous, ought to be locked up sorts are not those with social disabilities, but those with social superpowers, the super-Allistics, the ones who can control thousands or millions of people and do. I mean, there is war and environmental collapse, and there are rich people controlling things, so the two may be one thing: they are making them happen. I know, their theory is they only attempt, but fail to control.

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They’re wrong at the very least, and this is them, “controlled.” If they really believed it “didn’t work,” you would expect them to make adjustments and they do not, because in some real way, of course it, “works.” Everything does something. It’s reality, not a videogame where some buttons do nothing.

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This is them, the actual living breathing results of their actual actions, and that they think none of it affects them because they think they would have been this way anyway – again, I’m sorry, it has to be part of their makeup, right? A thing their brains were not evolved to do, to connect the cause to the effect as regards themselves. “Human Nature,” may be built into them, the meme, not the Nature.

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About that, Human Nature.

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Tacit again perhaps, but the existing framing, the neurotypical framing of the situation is this meme, and the first thing it says is, it’s all Humans, we are all the same, somehow – and then if we’re not, that’s a problem, a pathology, but there is a grain of truth. Natures aren’t a thing, it’s not all humans that the meme fits, but it is a real thing, in its proper place, as is often the case, the bad meme indicates an effort, there is something they have been trying to get at that they are calling Human Nature, and despite they get it wrong, that something does exist.

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It’s Allistic Nature they are describing.

With the caveat that a more realistic, less creationist version of a “Nature,” would be a moving target in the real world of evolution, that creatures do have ways of being, perhaps this is a “Nature,” a way of being, but that they simply aren’t static or permanent. In evolution, my Nature is a little different from my father’s, because evolution, because things change. But I still have my way of being, my Nature, I suppose, which has individual elements, but is largely an Autistic nature – and the Allistics’ “Human Nature,” is of course, Allistic Nature.

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Again, I’m ignorant, I don’t know enough to postulate an ADHD Nature and other sorts, but this is the point, that “Nature,” in this sense, means neurotype. There are Autistic Natures, surely Downs’ Syndrome Natures, and Allistic natures and surely others.

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To make Human Nature, you’d have to add them all together, clearly.

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In some senses, that is what “Human Nature,” means, in some contexts it does apparently include every possible trait, as they say, from murder and larceny to selflessness and sacrifice, but this is rhetoric, of course a term that means “anything and everything,” isn’t a useful term, and a “Nature,” with nothing left out tells us nothing.

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But a collective Human Nature would add them all together, would need and use every trait. Inasmuch as their Human Nature is supposed to apply to us all, they also pointedly apply the worst elements to us all, they call the traps of their own deficiencies – neurotypes have superpowers and deficiencies – simply ‘the Human Condition,’ and assure us none can escape. I mean, it’s nice to share your Human Nature with Fred Rogers, not so much with Anthony Bourdain. Much less others that we see on TV a lot.

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I’m saying, since Human Nature isn’t universal, neither is the Human Condition, that that is only the Allistic Condition. I’m saying the neurodivergent have the keys to the universal prison of Human Nature, that it is not universal, that indeed humans exist that don’t have some of these problems and can show the normal folks the way out of them.

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It’s a mess, but that’s the theory.

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And this is where I am coming from when I speak, I am Autistic, this is the neurodiversity from here, this is the Way It Is to me and while as always, I have pride in myself and my thoughts, I don’t think this is what most Autists think – yet, maybe, I hope – they mostly think the stuff with the DEP in it, and that configures as ‘different but equal,’ and seems to accept half of the neurotypical premise when they speak and talks about ‘Autism,’ like it’s a thing and like Allism is just ‘normal,’ not a definable type.

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I can’t really join any of those conversations and I need y’all to join mine instead.

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Don’t we all, though.

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Bah. Autistic Nature. Whaddayagonnado. 😉

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Jeff,

Jan. 4th., 2024

Equal and Opposite

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When we’re doing the “equal and opposite,” thing, the Double Empathy thing, talking about “Autistic goals and values,” as opposed to NT ones, of course, “values,” and “goals,” are generic, content free, they mean whatever they mean to a reader already, and we’re mostly just telling them whatever they already wanted to hear.

I mean, we’re stuck with it, the NT values we are contrasted against have always been that way, just, “values,’ you know, good ol’ values! Everybody loves values! Think “Family values,” if you’re not with me yet.

It’s something I struggle with, fighting generic language is fighting ghosts. They “never said that,” because they never really said anything. Something has occurred to me this morning of Christmas Eve, though, is that this ploy is working, NT society is keeping its secrets this way, but more, they maintain their theory of neurodiversity this way too because we are stuck with it and play along and start talking about “Autistic values,” so that now it all sounds equal and opposite, when in reality, “Autistic values,” means anything and everything except “Allistic values,” just as Allism and Autism define each other, Allism and Autism’s goals define one another.

Also, just as I place Autism as the entire world and Allism as a new and specific thing, the human warrior caste or something – do keep up, this is our science here, LOL – then so too are Allistic values something very specific, while “Autistic values,” would simply be everything else.

Of course, that isn’t right, to put the whole world into a box labelled, “Autistic values,” is it, when we know where they file boxes with that label.

Jeff

Dec. 24th., 2023

The Shape of Things, Part Two

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These were my post-blog comments online, me putting the raw idea of this in context.

700 words to say Autism is not the new thing in the conversation.

Theories are supposed to make predictions if they want to be heard, and I’m not sure it counts as a prediction, but:

Not saying you can poison a person into Autism, but is you could, if, say Thalidomide caused some percentage of babies to show up with something that even looks like Autism, that this model of Neurodivergence would account for it.

The idea is, that since Allism is the new thing, and a very specific, complex, genetic thing, that it may indeed be susceptible to some poisons or other, that is to say developmental interference, or damage.

We at abusewithanexcuse dot com feel that poisons are unlikely to create or enhance things as complex as neurotype, to create a million neurological and genetic connections that add up to a complete model of a human, but quite likely to harm one, needing only to destroy some link in the chain, and not build an entire new chain.

 /2

One big prediction this theory does make, although testing will be impossible, is that they are never going to find the genetic component for “Autism,” because it is not the specific thing, Allism is.

Impossible to test, because they will either say they did or search forever.

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/4 was nuthin’

The theory in the Dawn of Everything, suggests, if I consider my idea of Neurodiversity here, that Allism has been manageable for much of prehistory and in much of the world, that humanity cycles into the patriarchal, conflict lifestyle and back out of it again on a schedule of only three or four hundred years.

But it also talked about a sense in academia that humanity is presently stuck on the dark end, and that perhaps Europe has been for some time.

Just giving you what I got about it . . . 😇

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I know what I can say, is that this is theory, I am trying to make our own version of the human story and so our own version, or a better version for everyone, of the human sciences – I am trying to create good guy science, non-patriarchal science.

And the point of that blog, to say “Autism was here first,” it seems pointless, but the point of science, the reason we need the scientific high ground is that without it, our answers to the empty threats of the Moms and researchers are empty also – and they rule the world, their empty reasons win.

With this story, with this science, if that’s what it is, we have an answer for the Autism Moms, is my point, with this structure, and them trying to say, “NOW we’re getting all these Autistics (same as they say, “all these gays nowadays,”), and it’s because Tylenol or whatever, we can say, “No, Mom, this here science says YOU are the thing we have NOW, that you are the new thing, that stuff about Autistics, “now,” has been disproven.”

/6

Jeff

Dec. 14th., 2023

The Shape of Things

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It’s not a completely different story, our origins when we add neurotypes into the theory, possibly the existing story fits whole inside this one, the entire currently held prehistory of our species could be pared down somewhat to be only specifically the prehistory, the genesis of today’s most apparently common neurotype.

Perhaps the whole Man the War Ape, evo-bro patriarchal story is kind of true and real, if not for all of us, but for one sort, perhaps this is not the story of humanity’s emergence from the general population of animals, but the story of Allistics’ emergence from the world of non-Allistic animals, humans included. We are still actually animals after all, there is no true line between Earth’s creatures on that fantastic vector, other than every animal’s discernment between their own self and others. Surely the flamingos’ ideology place them as “different,” from the rest of us too, on that basis.

Ah, I like that.

These efforts always look hopeless when I begin but after the first step, the next one becomes available. I like that, and this is what the existence of different neurotypes does for us, it makes it possible to say things about people without having to slip into a world of ideologies where it has to mean, “all people.” “Slip into,” Allistic world, is what that is, perhaps. I think the existing narrative, our currently held prehistory is Allistic, and “all humans,” makes sense to them, it’s a feature or it comes with other features, part of something they evolved for.

It came up online yesterday, and it’s always good to remember because we are hardwired for creationism (trademark, my idea, an AST idea), that if a thing exists in life, it is because evolution has made a case for it in real life, and Allistic people and the things they believe do surely exist.

But, you know, the world is a big place and gets bigger with everything you learn, and time? Don’t get me started, LOL. There has been a lot, a lot of time. Just because evolution grows a thing, that don’t make it right. There’s a lot of horrendous crap out there, parasites and whatnot.

Yes, that’s right, parasites “out there,” LOL.

Ahem. Never mind.

Not sure it’s coming through, did you get it yourself?

Not a parasite, I mean did you see the structure, the timeline – animals, including humans in our terrible Eden until something changes and the new thing, not “humans,” like we tell it, but Allistic humans appear, Allistics are the new thing, and not to confuse matters, a new thing, perhaps a sort of a creation, I mean of self-directed evolution, these Allistic humans, perhaps in the existing framework often confused with ‘modern humans?’

Snap you back out of the 19th. Century textbook I’m always writing and back to present day reality – Allistics are new. They are not the forever, proper, intelligently designed Human species, the original, no. They are the new kid on the block. There are not “Autistics now,” as the fascists and fascist adjacent like to say. There always were, everything is Autistic, “Autistic,” apparently defines all the diversity that isn’t Allistic.

There are Allistics now, is the point.

Equal and opposite, something is causing these ‘Autism Moms and Researchers,’ and I need a grant. Oh, right. Preliminary evidence, then?

A bit of an insight from writing and talking online last evening, that can we look at the perhaps religious oil execs who ignored the climate, can you look at that probably neurotypical guy, I mean, he doesn’t run his industry alone, can you look at that guy and say, “this seems like a neurotype that has lasted three million years?”

Can you look at the nuclear bomb and say, “this seems like a neurotype that would last three million years?” To poison the Earth for tens, hundreds of thousands of years to win a three year war? This is the OG, tried and true human neurotype? Three million years and looking forward to three million more?

Isn’t it far more likely that this is a new and hardly viable mind that has finished its planet in the evolutionary blink of an eye?

Jeff

Dec. 14th., 2023

T Baby – A History of Illness

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It’s a cliché, that somebody notices an Autistic child or younger person and that’s how the parents find out it’s in the family, that one or both of them are Autistic too, that’s what happened to me, with some wrinkles, the younger person was an adult, and the family communication has not been great.

On a personal level, it answers everything, my being Autistic, or nearly everything, explains much about my life that no amount of reading and learning from the neurotypical world has been able to. Personal matters aside, the concept of neurotype answers a lot about the world too.

So I had one child that seemed like me, and they’re one of us and now I know I am, and they tell me they all are, my ex also, and I admit my ex requires some sort of explanation, and there are a lot of reasons to think they’re Autistic, in fact it’s possible that the only person on Earth who could possibly think they aren’t is me. Apparently, though, Autistics do Allistic stuff all the time as a part of their masking, so despite I may feel ostracized and hated on for my differences as though my ex and kids were neurotypical, it can always be that one’s haters are masking Autists, so who knows.

I guess it’s true that their family seemed . . . stridently white and normal, like they tried too hard, maybe. It always seemed phony and a little desperate, I suppose it could have been masking – but either way, real or feigned, it’s neurotypicality hating me either in person or by remote control. It seems a distinction without a difference from this side of the DEP.

We’ll pause here for the ‘illness,’ stuff this is supposed to be about:

But looking back on my life with this new understanding, I see now that I spent my first nearly ten years in meltdown, with the other kids pushing me over into it if I wasn’t already, but there’s more, I had my own stress driving me to meltdown, health problems and pain – that I have finally processed and verbally confirmed with a sibling to be the result of the most famous toxic drug in history, the morning sickness pill, Thalidomide.

There was a gut deformity, which they described to me back then as an “umbilical hernia,” but which was later revealed to have been extra parts. Seems the umbilicus was a live piece of bowel and was not atrophying and wouldn’t heal, didn’t stop bleeding, or presumably, hurting, and after a month of life there was an abdominal surgery. I can’t say my bowel troubles are due to the drug, or the surgery, but they exist, and I think they’re on the Thalidomide baby list of problems.

I don’t know why they didn’t tell me, why it wasn’t part of the conversation with me forever, why no-one ever said, “you know you’re a Thalidomide baby, right?” It surely wasn’t a secret during my early life when I was an always crying pain the ass, couldn’t have been. I can see why there was never an assessment or an Autism diagnosis though – they already knew what was wrong with me, I guess. Not sure about the secret, or the knowledge of it even, maybe, because we missed the class action suits. Gawd, Mom could’ve used some money, I was a full time job and I wasn’t the only kid. Well, I guess there was no money until decades later? Still, of course, still.

Plus Gawd knows I could have had my health troubles tested for and diagnosed, I bet some of it could have been more treatable. My GP watched my goiter grow and heard me complain and never guessed hyperthyroid, I didn’t learn it until he retired. If I had known I was a victim, it would have been on my “watch for,” list.

So I haven’t seen anything to suggest all Thalidomide victims share a neurotype, that there is one, I mean I don’t think either Tylenol or Thalidomide “create a neurotype,” so I’m still just Autistic in the head and a Thalidomide baby in my gut, my thyroid, and my little AA fingers. My feet are small too. I can’t say that all the appendages were affected, it’s possible that my un-poisoned destiny included a larger member, but apparently I’m within the “normal,” range, and I don’t have to tell you how well within, ha.

Generally, as it would seem with the severely affected, the effect is increased further from the core, my legs get shorter all the way down, and my torso belongs on some fellow of average height. Pure, dumb guess about how it works, just from looking at myself and knowing about the limbless folks and extrapolating – I don’t know that.

A quick investigoogling says there are no documented second generation problems for the children of the Thalidomide babies, this is good news, but I’m not sure how new or good this information is. A paper trashed “Lamarckism,” that doesn’t sound very new. Also, to my mind, the man is having his comeuppance, to say his function doesn’t exist is to say evolution doesn’t exist, basically.

He got trashed by people who had only learned of evolution yesterday, and mostly, people still aren’t really processing it today, see my last many blogs.

Never mind that for now, so far so good, my kids are probably not suffering from Thalidomide – but I’m going to keep looking, and let them know, pending new data.

There is one statistic that is interesting and problematic – they say some thirty percent! – of Thalidomide kids show up Autistic, this is bothersome, I still don’t see how poisoning causes neurotypes. I have to tell myself that the framing of neurotypes is backwards to explain it, that poisons do not create anything, but some of them perhaps damage Allism, is the proper context and the point. Hmm.

In my framing, the Thalidomide damage to my Allism . . . looks heritable, since I have Autistic kids? I mean, my father may have been, my ex may be . . . so my case can’t mean anything, but if 30% lose their Allism through Thalidomide poisoning, and that loss remains, the “Autism,” is heritable? It’s all rather complex.

Again, speculative, never mind, the community will see this as a betrayal, but that statistic isn’t mine and I did not say anything “causes Autism,” I said maybe things hurt Allism – if you have ever read me, you know I see “normal folks,” as the whole problem, and if something harms Allism – please, take it. Tylenol, not Thalidomide, Good Lord.

I mean if your Allism were all that gets harmed, of course.

Then, fill your boots, LOL. OK, fine, it’s a gonzo science blog after all, let’s do this.

Honestly – the statistic is probably garbage and those thirty percent are something, but not necessarily Autistic. I’m remembering the supposed rodent studies and Tylenol – “Autism-like symptoms,” which were simply passivity and/or stupidity, and the “appearance of Autism,” is probably meaningless. I still like my theory, but it is quite possible that this statistic regarding Thalidomide is bogus and no support for it – and the same with Tylenol, of course, those studies I’m already convinced are bogus and no support for my framing, because they are no support for anything.

I suppose all I can really say about it is that the Allists have their framing ready, Autistics are broken, so something is causing them and it should be stopped – unjustifiably, I think, at least contextual only – broken for what? Do we know the  Purpose of Humanity, so that we know when it is being impeded?

 I’m guessing that the Thalidomide scrutiny launched the Tylenol theory, got the idea out there about chemical cause for ‘retardation,’ which included Autism back then, but . . . hey, this was always their less conscious framing perhaps, something is hurting my Allism? (It’s the “strength,” remember, something is hurting their fighting readiness, is the point for them. It’s an existential thought.)

It’s what they are trying to say, but Allism isn’t allowed to be a thing, it’s supposed to be everybody, Human Nature, donchaknow – so now it’s the “Humans,” vs the “divergent,” which means the “pathologized,” instead of just the differences between types, something is harming “Humanity,” not just Allism. It is fantastically frustrating, attempting to speak across neurotypes, I almost understand the Allistics resorting to force about it, reason across the gulf seems impossible, but call it intuition if you must, call it prognostication – but from my side and my neurology, the opposite framing is more intuitive, that Allistics are problematic, so something is causing them and it should be stopped. I mean, functional for what? Do we know the Purpose of Humanity, so that we know how to achieve it?

Just saying, it seems like the Allists think the purpose is fighting, and they think that this is what “Humans,” think, not just Allists, that is to say, they don’t think they think it, they just think it’s the way it is. This is why that no matter what happens, it all seems beyond their ability to stop it, it’s not their mindset, something that could change, it’s “the way it is,” something that cannot. Hmm. Seems like a bit of detail I usually fail to find, that. It’s OK, isn’t it?

IF – only if, I am not convinced it’s even possible let alone has ever occurred, but IF – if you could take a child with no family history of anything but Allism and poison them in vitro in such a way as to produce an Autistic child – do we really claim this level of science, that we have “created,” an Autistic mind? Or would it be a million times more likely that your poison simply derailed the creation of an Allistic one, leaving behind an evolved and pre-existing OG neurotype? Do we think our crude poisons can create entire neurologies, or do we think those already existed and the poison killed something else, as poisons do?

Ha, what this sounds like, where this bit goes – that we think sometimes we can accidentally poison the brain slug that drives us to conflict and war, the warrior neurology as a brain parasite. Again, not saying this has ever happened that we “made” anybody Autistic. I’m only saying if we ever did, I couldn’t assume we broke that person, it would make more sense to me that broke the Allistic process only, and that the Autistic that results is an intact, pre-existing form that is a complete human being.

Again, if and only if any of the statistics regarding higher incidence rates of “Autism,” due to drugs are real and true does any of this logic matter – and even then it only matters to me inasmuch as it makes the case for Allism as a neurotype and a problem and not as the Gold Standard of Humanity.

I do think something created all of the neurologies, of course, but also of course I don’t think it is something as simple a s a poison that creates Allism, it is a very complex combination of things including all the complexity of biological evolution and much human behaviour besides, complete with biological deceptions – but a poison is defined as a simple answer for the complexities of life, isn’t it. It can probably work this way around, some poison or other can probably destroy particular neurologies, why not? At least it looks that way to my neurology.

I’m starting to think it sounds like “Awakenings,” like when I shone briefly in school and eventually fledged, that must have looked like a damned miracle. And I don’t remember those early tough years very well, like it happened to someone else. I think Autistic meltdown maybe explains that memory loss? What happens in trauma stays n trauma or something. My whole unhatched life I worried it was trauma I was blocking out, but there has been damned little corroboration about any trauma that the Allistic world would recognize, it’s all been fog of war stuff, sort of unknowable, the rumour of trauma only. Overload and meltdown makes far better sense.

The memories haven’t suddenly appeared, but at least that empty space has some context now.

This, as usual, is not going according to plan and where I wanted to go next is not where this leads, so I’m going to stop here and sit with this for a bit and post this in the science blog, worry about the personal stuff another day.

Good luck out there.

Jeff Nov. 9th., 2023